Did you know that Tom Cruise was in four movies that came out in 1983? What a hard worker! In this one he’s one of four co-leads. He and his buddies are culturally insensitive high-schoolers who go to Tijuana to get laid.

Tom’s performance is strikingly un-Cruise. He just plays kind of a dorky teen without much personality. Shelly Long is in it, and she’s pretty engaging. For some reason the movie seems to be set in the early 60s, even though there’s no reference to it being a period piece. Weird, slow moving, occasionally funny, often xenophobic. Great soundtrack of rock and roll and doo wop hits.

I know that there are people who consider this a classic. I thought it was actively bad. The photography was good, and Matt Dillon was good, and I hated everything else.

Tom Cruise is barely even in it! He plays basically the same role as he did in Taps – the overly excited, violent member of the “good” gang.

Taps isn’t very good. Cruise is the 3rd or 4th most important character in an ensemble. He does have a few good Cruise moments. Even in 1981, he was barely sane.

The movie is about a military school that is commandeered by its students after they learn it’ll be shut down. The characters are pretty broadly drawn but who cares because it’s an allegory! It’s a ponderous movie but it isn’t very deep. Also in it: young Sean Penn! He’s pretty good.